There's No Place Like Home, Wherever It Is...

Wassup. It's been a while, I know. Apologies on my part. I've been really busy lately. I have spent the past few months juggling two jobs, packing up all my shit, and watching my sanity slowly slip away with the last remnants of my old life. It's really less heinous then it sounds but I have a flair for drama.
Whenever something weird is happening in my life, I usually have an urge to write. I write anything; stories, songs, poems, whatever. It's therapeutic. Right now, I have an urge to write. I have spent the last year watching my family mourn the loss of a dearly beloved staple in our lives... our family farm. For a year, this has been a constant weight on my shoulders and my back is starting to ache. I have a distinct talent of shutting out such emotion and continuing on with my daily life. It's not like it had no effect on me, I just chose not to respond. I have been accused of being completely devoid of emotion. This is a complete false-hood. I just hate dealing with emotion openly.
I'm losing my childhood home. I have long since said good-bye to my childhood, but I never thought I would have to say good-bye to my home. It has always been there for me, a constant source of comfort to soothe whatever has pained me. There is a quote from the film Garden State that has completely stuck with me since I heard it. The quote states, "When does your home become not your home anymore, but just a place to put your shit?"
That question blew my mind... It was like someone finally stated the question I had been struggling with. When did my home just become a place to put my shit? I think that's been my problem for awhile. Even before my parents decided to sell our house, I began to see our house in a different light. It no longer had that sense of home and comfort that I had always counted on. I haven't felt at home for a long time, and I think that's what I'm missing... a sense of home.
For the first time in my life, the responsibility of making a home for myself has finally fallen upon my own shoulders. I'm not only moving out of my house, but I'm moving out of my parents' house, hopefully for the last time.
I'm finally responsible for every aspect of my life and that scares that absolute shit out of me. I have always been a fan of routine and familiarity, and it scares me to think that I have a completely new life just weeks away... I shouldn't say completely new life. I still have my friends and family as a constant, but there's no denying I have finally realized that I'm going to miss this place I used to call home.