Face-Hooked

I am about to step up onto my metaphorical soapbox, so I'd prepare myself. I begin my plight with a blip of conversation that I have had on my many accounts with variable of my friends;

Me: Hey, guess what? I totally found an original piece of Judy Garland sheet music! Isn't that just flippin' awesome?!
My lovely variable friend: I know, I saw it on your Facebook status.
Me: Ah... well, I was excited. And apparently I have no new news.

Quoting the fabulous Steve Martin, "Welllllll EXXXCCCCUUUUUSEEEEEE MEEEEEE!!!" What has our society come to!? When has it become a faux pas to verbally repeat something that was published on a social-networking sight? Is it poison to your ears? Can you physically not withstand hearing something that you've already read? I mean, isn't there an entire genre of books that are turned into movies that serve the same purpose? This is not the only time I have had this conversation. It has obviously weighed on my mind for some time.
I apologize if I come off a bit harsh, but I tend to get this way when I'm irritated. I have tendency to vent my opinions to anything not nailed down. My friends can see it in my eyes. Usually, my irateness is a form of humor to my close circle of friends. If someone is absolutely pissing me off, my friends usually make a series of hand signals similar to the signals used to land planes, and gather in an abandoned room so I can de-pressurize and continue having a good time. I'm a sarcastism-pressure cooker.
However, I do not have my de-pressurizers around me at the moment. Namely, they are Shannon, Amber, and Kaleigh. They all bring something to the table in the ways of calming me down. Shannon always tells me I'm being ridiculous and tells me "it ain't like that!" But I can still get her to laugh. Amber is my little sidekick. God love her. If I ever need a comrade to enjoy my sarcastic quips, it's her. Kaleigh just tells me I'm being ridiculous, which is needed because I usually am being ridiculous. The girl keeps me grounded. However, I digress.
So I am using you, dearest readers to vent and sarcasticly de-pressurize. I feel that if I'm venting cyberly, my topic should be related to the computer.

My Love/Hate Relationship with Facebook

I have often asked myself, "What have I come to?" This is usually after I have frantically checked my Facebook account for, I don't know, the fifth time in one day. I feel somewhat ashamed of myself. How lame have I become?! I am somewhat lucky to be apart of the generation that remembers life without Tivo, DVR, and ipods. Yet, how is it possible that I cannot recall my life without the daily greeting "Welcome to Facebook!"?
I ask you, what the hell? I am serious when I say I love Facebook for very self-possessed reasons. I love seeing that little red conversation bubble in the lower right-hand corner, especially when it contains a number higher than one. I love knowing that someone cared enough for to write on my wall, comment on my status, and maybe perhaps, if I'm lucky... tag a picture of me. I giggle like a little school girl when that happens!
However, I don't give a shit about alot of people. I don't care that you're going to be leaving your computer, I refuse to "text it!". I don't care that you love your family and friends. We all pretty much knew that. I do, however, appreciate clever statuses. I really do. The funnier the better.
So to conclude, I am a very selfish Facebook member. I care for a few peeps, namely my top friends, and those who humor me. Now, away with you. Somebody just ended their relationship and I can't wait to see the comment blood-bath.